More From Walmart

I  have infinite admiration for the sheer strength  of good quality  denim.
Moreover, I will be  eternally thankful if Honeysuckle's jeans wait  until she reaches the truck to explode.   Seriously, they should consider  using denim on the next NASA space  shuttle.

Spring,   Texas

You  have no idea how exhausting it can be putting on  tight purple sweat  pants!

Pensacola, Florida

Don't  laugh! It’s okay, because Bambi's granddaughter  borrowed her skirt. Plus,  today is combination Casual Friday and Crazy  Hair Day, all rolled into  one.

College  Station, Texas

Apparently,  Lester Flem doesn't know whether he's  homosexual, heterosexual, bisexual, pansexual,  polysexual, or asexual.
However, if   you look up the word 'Transgender' in the  dictionary... BINGO!!! There  you will see a picture of dear old flaming  Lester in his boots.

Laguna Niguel, California

I  call a new rule  at  Wal-mart: If  the hole in your jeans is big enough for me to  slip my hand inside and sneak a little squeeze,  then by golly you best be on guard!
The  squeezer, however, retains the right to either  squeeze or not to squeeze!

Sarasota, Florida

Unfortunately,  the only strap working on this entire outfit is  the one holding that hideous hair in  place. Is that former Federal Reserve  Chairman Paul Volcker's wife or is that Paul  Volcker?

Los  Angeles, California

Where  exactly does one buy a short pink outfit like  this to beef shop in?

Birmingham,   Alabama

So,  this is either a cross-dressing nautical Popeye  enthusiast OR well, fill in  anything. It  really doesn't matter, because  nothing we  say will make any sense.
Who lets  these people out of the house  un-chaperoned?

Destin, Florida

Those  purple shorts are HOT! I  saw those same shorts one time on an elephant in  a circus in Belarus.
The  house shoes make the outfit!

Columbus, Ohio

Whatever  happened to No Shirt, No Shoes, No  Service?
Is that a turban on his head or  a serving of Jiffy-Pop?
Is the girl in  the  background taking a picture or  teaching the guy  in the black wife beater T-shirt to play, "Here  is the church and here is   the steeple. Open it up and here are  the people!"
Is the chick in the green  bikini  top putting on  makeup?
Honey, you should have saved your   money and purchased either a T-shirt or a  case of Slim  Fast.

Baton   Rouge, Louisiana

Don't  worry, I've already forwarded this picture to  Burberry Worldwide  in London. I  thought it would be beneficial for them to be  reminded of why they got into the fashion and  design  industry in the first place.  
I'm sure Burberry will be ecstatic over seeing their vision spring  to life.  
Exciting too, is  how Lulu's slippers simply make those shorts  POP!!

Toss  in some cat food and Cooter is the loneliest guy  in town!

Fort  Payne, Alabama

Someone  else can try to figure out what she's doing,  because I have to go wash my eyes out with  bleach.

Oxford,   Mississippi

I'm  not sure what kinky Bathsheba Squeal plans to do  with that pie filling. But  there is just something about her that tells me  she doesn't bake, she doesn't watch Rachael  Ray, and she has no intention of using that pie  filling in the kitchen.

La  Verne, California

For  those times when you need fried okra and chicken  strips so bad, that you just can't wait for the  bleach to set.

Montgomery, Alabama

Is  it even legal to sell that shade of  pink? I  love the way Ms. Incense Berkowitz color  coordinated her reusable shopping bag to match  her shoes, purse, leggings, shirt,   jacket, earrings and  necklace. If  a bra had been necessary, do you think for one  second it would have been any color  other than SHRIEKING  PINK?
Glendale, California    

Agerton?   Is that you?  What do you expect me  to say? That's  exactly what he looks like from  the rear. True,  I've never seen Agerton in heels.
Still,  if I told you there is a picture where purple  hair is the least weird thing going on, would  you believed me?
Honestly, is that a man  or a woman or is Lester Flem back in the  store?

Mobile, Alabama

Britney  Spears has done let herself go  again.

Slidell, Louisiana

Dear  Mrs. Razzlebone-Karbofski, it was cute to dress  your boys Festus and Cletus alike when they were  two years old, but at 45?  Well, not so  much!
Suddenly, Festus says, "Hey,  Cletus, I been thankin. If my truck could travel  faster than the speed of light, would my  headlights work?"

Tifton, Georgia

I  am so embarrassed.
Seriously, I have no  idea how this photo of my son's 5th grade  history teacher and part-time Gun Care  Instructor, Miss Cinnamon Goodpicker, got mixed  in with this roll of film.

Katy, Texas

Packing  this rear in camouflage shorts is like trying to  hide an elephant behind a  squirrel.

Seattle, Washington

And  men claim they can't meet classy women in  stores? Go  figure!

Louisville, Kentucky

Is  that a THONG Ollie Hopnoddle is  wearing?  I can't look again or I'll go  blind.

Mountain Brook, Alabama

For  my own sanity, I have to assume that Gussie  Klothgrunt is shoplifting two pork roasts in her  shirt.
Simply because there is no  possible way that can be anything other that two  pork roasts in her  shirt. Can't  be!

Forestdale,   Alabama

Aw  yes, don't you just love the holiday season in  Easley! I  hope Abe is buying some new  shirts. Is  it really necessary to say ANYTHING  ELSE

No  way, Laquanda, absolutely  not! That  outfit does not at all make you look like a  hooker.

Midlothian,   Virginia

It's  like a big pink garbage bag filled with creamed  corn and door knobs.

Houston, Texas

Mesmerized  here at the  Wal-mart Hiring Center,  Pinetop thinks this is his lucky day because his  mechanic called an hour ago and said, "I  couldn't fix your brakes, so I made your  horn louder."
Besides, all his  redneck buddies told him he was a lock to get  this job at Wal-mart, provided he can remember  not to smoke weed or drink beer during the  job interview.

Austin, Texas

This  is perfectly  understandable. Elena  Kagan was just on her way to the Country Club  when she remembered she need some coffee and a  couple of yoga videos.
Besides, she  thought to herself, I'll  just throw on  these gray shorts and I'll be smokin.  

Nashville,   Tennessee

Is  that a baby dangling from Raylene's waist like a  fanny pack? I  don't believe I've ever seen anything like that  before. 
The only thing wrong with  the gene pool around the Ozarks is there's no  lifeguard. 

Fort Smith, Arkansas

I  love talking with Freidagurtz Finkelstein,  because she always seems so surprised and  interested in what I have to  say.

Grand  Rapids, Michigan

Holy  Golden Illusions of Grandeur, I gotta get me  that outfit!

Alpharetta, Georgia

Either  that lady has a tail or Barney is stuck where  the sun doesn't shine.

Loves  Park, Illinois